okayy. so today i got up at 7 plus to go to school to study. so unlike me, i know. lol. was really tired, but i had to cathc up with my stuff la. after three days of band camp and fun, it really is time to get back down to work.

got home and fell asleep. rudely woken up by the stupid loud ringing sounds of the house phone. ughh. so got up, went to have a shower. and i'm still sleepy. there's band concert rehearsal tmr at 10. oh man. and it only ends at 4, i predict it'll drag till 5. darn.

it's been hard for me. i can't believe i could actually endure it for such a long period of time. i just don't know what i'm waiting for. i just can't bear to live it any longer, but i can't bear to admit it either. i hoped for a just wish things was better. i always thought that things were great, but somehow, things just suck. i don't know why i get scolded and angered at things i do, even though i know nothing is wrong. i don't know why i can't do things he can. i just wanna know the reason.

i'm determined to change things. i'm ever ready for anything and everything that comes by. i just wish sadness will change into happiness soon. i just wish we were like others. i cry every night just thinking about it. i pray so hard for me to live it off better than how it is now. i just wish i could sort out everything.

get well soon my dearest. i just hope you'll stay home to rest and recover. i just do.

sung at 8:27 PM
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